Failure

Today is a bad day.

I’ve been doing this drawing thing now for about a month, a little longer.  I do enjoy doing it, but sharing what I do and letting other people see it is very frustrating.

There’s this thing called “Inktober”, where there is a list of drawing prompts for each day of the month.  The idea is to draw something in ink for each prompt.  Fast, transport, big, prompts like that.  Nothing overly specific, but will allow for some creativity.  So I’m doing that, plus some other things as well.

I’m not good at drawing. I’m not horrible, but I’m entirely self-taught (I’m not bragging here) and I’m still learning.  I started posting what I was drawing on Imgur, while there were some positive comments, I got a lot of down votes.  (I wrote about this in an earlier entry)  I also have a blog for my drawings on Tumblr. I started following other artists and “liking” various works that I saw there, but after a month, I have four followers: My wife, a stranger who’s blog I started following, and two “hook-up” blogs.

Sometimes my wife will repost my artwork, but not always, and she doesn’t always “like” everything, which I’ve told her that she shouldn’t feel the need to if she doesn’t want to.  Every now and then I’ll do a drawing related to what she does, and those she’ll like and repost, and her followers will “like” my drawing, and those are really the only ones that people will see and comment on and “like”.  Unless I do one that she reposts, and nothing, as I recently did with one. (She didn’t even “like” it.)

It’s very, very depressing, because I’m not a great artist, and looking at others’ works, mine really sucks.  It’s ok, and I understand that if a random person saw what I did, they’re not going to say “wow”.  I think as much as the daily prompts are forcing me to work every day at it ultimately helps in the long run, I don’t feel like I can spend as much time on things as I would like, especially since it’s not a medium I’m comfortable with.  I’m going to try and work at it and see how I can improve.  But like almost everything else in life, this is just another thing where I can do something ok, but not well, and I doubt I’ll ever reach that point.  Because I just suck at everything.

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